Zarana the Teenage Terrorist #2 – “Vacation is Half the Battle!”

Posted on February 27, 2023November 12, 2023 by phil.wrede

The COBRA-affiliated terrorist Zarana sits on a speedboat in the middle of a lake with her boyfriend, the twin’d terrorist Tomax. He is driving the boat, while she leans over him with a hand around his shoulder, taking a selfie of the two of them. The title of this comic strip, “Zarana the Teenage Terrorist in… ‘Vacation is half the battle!’” (stylized to resemble the title of the ‘Sabrina the Teenage Witch’ sitcom title) is visible at the top of the image.

Tomax expresses some surprise that Zarana’s father (the G.I. JOE code-named Outback) let them take his boat out on the lake. Tomax thinks that Outback’s love for his daughter overrides his hatred of Tomax. Zarana climbs on Tomax’s lap, not interested in talking about her father.

Outback’s trusty crocodile friend, Fiona, raises her head out of the water. In terror, Tomax turns the boat abruptly away from Fiona, causing Zarana to fall out of his lap. On the shore, Outback’s best friend, the G.I. JOE code-named Bazooka, holds a beer and laughs at the sight in the water.

Bazooka and Outback wonder what Zarana sees in her boyfriend, while Zarana threatens to completely eject Tomax from the boat, if his explanation for why he pushed her away does not completely satisfy her.

Tomax points to Fiona, who’s still swimming off the side of the boat. Outback tells Bazooka that Fiona was Zarana’s mom’s name, and that’s why he gave the crocodile that same name.

Bazooka spits out his beer in surprise, and laughs as Outback goes on to make a sexist joke about Zarana’s mother. Bazooka takes out the weapon from which he takes his nickname, remarking to Outback that he’s not the only one with cool toys.

Outback loads a round into the bazooka, while Zarana and Tomax wonder just what they’re up to, on the shore.

Bazooka fires a shot in the water off the bow of the boat, and Zarana throws herself to the deck just in time for water to explode next to her.

Zarana orders Tomax to turn the boat to shore, and she takes out her machine gun, threatening to kill her dad for what he’s just done.

The credits for this comic strip, including the photographer(s) who took the images used as background photography, the use of particular fonts created by Blambot, and of stock visual effects by Action VFX, the ownership of G.I. JOE by Hasbro, the creation of G.I. JOE characters by actual factual people, and the character photography/script/lettering by me, Phil Wrede.

Escalating the aggression, and the toxicity, and the scale props from the last installment, hopefully this equates to an escalation of the comedy, too!

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